3:57 AM

watched the dark knight rises today. and it makes me wonder, if ever a man like bruce wayne ever existed.


no, it's not about the money or the girls he had, but the will. he lost his parents when he was still a kid. what's more terrifying, they were both killed in front of his eyes. living alone in this world, without anyone related to you is like dying a slow and painful death. heck, even people of gotham city hates him for the death of harvey dent. no, no spoilers here. and he still risked his life to save the city. hmm


enough with fairy tales. let's rewind to this morning. i woke up today, only to be disappointed by the morning sunshine. the whole house didn't woke up for sahur today. feeling sad, i went back to sleep and missed my physics lecture. haha. to think that i could start this semester with a new resolution. pfft


lately i've been spending too much time on my head. as introvert as it may seem, i started to feel better here. homesick starts to fade away slowly, but i still hope to return to Malaysia whenever i could. time is ticking without sympathy. maybe celebrating raya here wouldn't be such a bad idea. of course, the best place to be is Malaysia. when you've been away from your home country, it will be the only place that you miss the most.


i don't know what the future holds, but keeping this feeling for myself has made me a man full of imaginations, you know. too much imagination in your head could destroy yourself too. being friends is nice, but i want more than that. so much more. don't get me wrong, i'm just a normal guy :/ but the waiting should stop. i hate telling to myself that she would be the one. i've loved her since day one we first met back in the days. of course it's me who should man up and talk to her about this, but everytime she's there, my mind goes blanky-blank. such love drunk. only this blog is where i could let out what i had in mind.


being too secretive is not good, but i have my own reasons. you'll find another man. it was good while it lasts. i loved you before, and always do. clapping with one hand is stupid, and it stops now.


will i ever grew up?


oh btw, happy birthday sofia! you've grown up now. i can see myself in you. i can see myself in both my little sisters. i love you guys lots. don't miss me too much okay. tolong umi masak kuih raya tau. jangan main mercun ja. i'll be home before you know it :)


maybe there's still hope.